Monday, November 20, 2017

sammydress review part 2

Ok so my bottoms came today.  It was a little over a week, though I picked the fastest shipping this time.  The difference between 3-4 weeks versus one week was paying $21 instead of $16.  Not necessarily in a rush, but for $5 it was worth it.

Ok first the skirt.  Fits ok, the lace on the sides is not even laced (like buying shoes from payless).  The ends of the lace are frayed, one side isn't long enough, and I'm not sure it's very flattering on a bigger body.  Not super happy with this choice.

The pants with the flared lace on the bottom are super cute, I could totally see myself wearing them a lot.  Don't even necessarily need heels.

The jumpsuit is interesting, it fits pretty nicely on top, though trying to get it on by yourself is challenging.  I didn't feel like I could possibly zip up the back AND button the top button, so I tried sliding it on with everything up.  Unfortunately the top button popped off, but also cracked. So either I'm going to have to buy a new button, or I need to just sew the ends together.


Wednesday, November 15, 2017

chaturbate

I believe this is the same site I was on a little over a year ago.. Spent a lot of time there the past 2 days.  First night I focused on some trans girl in her mid 20's from Canada.  Guys in the chat kept asking her to show her penis, and she would say "you gotta pay to play", IE I need so many token donations from the room before I'll pop it out.  I actually sort of enjoyed listening to her talk about her life.  She was very cute, very little makeup, very comfortable gym clothes, nothing fancy.  If there wasn't a bulge in the front of her panties I would have said for sure she was female.

The 2nd night I focused on an average looking girl who had a surprising 2,000 viewers in her chat, but it was mostly because she had her cock out and kept stroking it.   Her lighting and camera resolution was very good, when she got close to the camera with her cock you could make out every wrinkle in her balls.  I probably watched her for like 2 hours, sort of mesmerized she could keep her cock hard and not have the urge to climax over the edge.  During the 2nd hour, she had precum dripping the entire time, at one point letting it purposely drip onto the camera and then licking it off.

Why do I bring this up?  I guess I find it intriguing not only watching the girls, but reading all the comments from viewers (and seeing how much they're willing to donate).  Just for kicks, I did create an actual account to look more into it.  So 100 tokens is $11, so figure each token is worth 11 cents.  Most of the girls had a goal of around 2,000 tokens, which would be $220.  That's not bad, but also sort of low considering these are people ON CAMERA EXPOSING THEMSELVES TO THE WORLD.  While a porn star makes that their career, these seem to be people with regular day jobs that do this on the side.  Also not all of them are covered in makeup, so many of them would be recognizable.  Here's another caveat, they aren't getting $220 for a couple hours work.  Chaturbate takes a 40% cut.. yea that's right, almost half your take goes poof (and that's assuming you aren't required to also report your income to the government).  So now it's more like $130 for a night of setting up cameras, getting dressed up, and  masturbating on camera while you beg for tokens and get guilted into thanking every viewer that donates, even if it's 1 token.  I also looked into what it takes to register an account.  I started by putting in a fake name, not realizing that the 2nd step is uploading a photo ID, and then another photo of your face next to a photo ID.  I get why they are required to do this since money is exchanging hands (and may have to report income to your social security number after all), but so much for anonymity.  They might say your ID is safe, but how many websites get hacked ALL THE TIME.  I can just imagine someone getting all the real info (and photo IDs) off the site, and everyone is exposed.

Of course, I'm not sure I would ever want to take the risk of being on camera again.  I mean I get the thrill of being desired, complimented.. but I don't know that I could really disguise myself good enough to feel safe enough that nobody would recognize me.

Monday, November 13, 2017

sammydress review

Ok, so there are probably dozens of "chinese import" clothing companies around now.  Many of them advertise on facebook, or you have a friend that gives them a chance to see if they can get some great clothes at super cheap prices.

So I took the plunge a little over a year ago.  Ordered a dress and a wig as a test run.  Unfortunately, things sell out a lot so all I have is a thumbnail to show this disappointing order.  Each item was less than $10 so I didn't have my hopes up:
The purple dress fit.. ok, but isn't nearly as flattering as the photo shows which is that it's very flowy.  Maybe I didn't order it big enough?  The wig also looks nothing like the photo, it's nowhere near that shiny or thick, it's a very cheaply made costume wig that fits bad, looks bad, and is completely unmanageable to style it.

Fast forward to a month ago, I decide to take another chance since I was going away on vacation for 2 weeks, and knew I would be greeted with a package by the time I came back.  Here is what I ordered this time and was a little more pleased.

The dress was $10, the top was $14 (shipping is something like $12-$15 for 2 week delivery).  Yes it's crazy that shipping is almost much as the merchandise itself, but again I was being cautious after my last order.  In both cases I ordered a 5x knowing that chinese import stuff runs small if you look at any of their charts.  I LOVE lace, I don't think women wear nearly enough of this in this day and age.  Now keep in mind that this stuff is likely made in sweat shops, likely they either have quotas or are getting paid by the garment, so expect stitching to look rushed by machine, and often there will be loose threads hanging towards the end of the stitch so you may have to cut strings off, or sometimes to preserve it from unraveling a quick lighter to fuse the end since most of the materials used is rayon, polyester, or some other cheap material.

Now I will say the dress still felt small at 5x (though it does stretch a lot).  I suppose if I had the right under garments to flare out my hips and butt I would feel ok wearing this so it's a keeper for now.

 Now this top I ABSOLUTELY FUCKING LOVE!  It has lace, it has batwings both in the arms and the bottom cut, it has a plunging neckline, it has a bow tied in the middle, and the cleavage looks amazing with the right bra.

Here's my new dilema, I have almost all dresses and very few bottoms.  To be honest, about the only bottoms I have is a gym workout pair of pants, a couple jean skirts (which I don't feel go real well with this top), and a pair of khaki short shorts that look like something that lara croft from tomb raider might wear.  Early on in life I had a couple of yoga pants with foot straps, but those are long gone (they were cheesy, but I had little taste as a late teen).  So off to sammydress again.

I bought this skirt for $6.50:

I bought these awesome looking pants for $12:

And then this pant suit came up during my bottom search for $13 so I took a chance on it:

When the bottoms come in I'll post another review.




Thursday, October 19, 2017

me too

If you're on facebook, you know what this means.  With the controversy over Weinstein abusing so many women in hollywood (and some of the stories are absolutely horrible), women have decided to use this moment to come out to let the world know they too have been sexually abused in some way.  They say 1 out of 6 women have been abused, which I think is probably low (even though that's still high).  I know my wife has been, and she hasn't posted on facebook because her parents are now on it, and if they saw that they'd immediately be asking her what happened.  So many women are either afraid to come out against their attacker, or fear nobody will believe them, or think it's their fault.

I bring this up not because it's important, or because someone who is fluid gender like me has a more compassionate stance than a lot of men might.  I think about how different my life could have been had I been born a woman.  Would I too have been sexually abused?  Beyond all the hardship that women have to go through already (looked down upon as the lower sex both physically and pay grade), they are also on constant alert of being attacked.

This goes back to my guilt of being transgender.  I get to sort of experience both sides in a way, and picking and choosing the best experience of both.  It's sort of like that movie "soul man" where the lesson he learns about being black is that he can stop taking tanning pills and become white anytime he wants, a real black person doesn't have that option.

Thursday, February 23, 2017

body swap dream.. nothing happened

So this was my dream the other night.  Like most dreams, there's not a lot of setup, and usually things aren't explained, it's sort of known knowledge (like you're being told the story via telepathy).  Anyway, I was at some sort of clinic and they had proposed to me that there was a girl that was looking to body swap with a man (permanently).  For whatever reason, the rules were that neither person swapping could know anything about the other (no medical history, age, height, didn't even know what that person looked like).  The doctor stepped away, and I snuck a peek at her file.  She was half my age, fit and beautiful, I had nothing to lose.  Yet.. even in a dream where it was only temporary,  I couldn't commit to it.  I told the doctor no, and left.  For the rest of the dream I had nothing but regret about what could have been.  For some reason I was also naked (in my male body) in public, and everytime I passed by a reflective surface I looked at my body and didn't like what I saw.  Now that's not to say I hated my gender, I think I hated my out of shape body more than anything, but I did imagine what it would be like in that female body.

Friday, February 3, 2017

trapped in the closet sucks

So a couple things...

First off, with the LGBT rights almost overruled by Trump (ironically his daughter helped save it)
http://www.politico.com/story/2017/02/ivanka-trump-jared-kushner-lgbt-order-234617

There's been of course a lot of postings on facebook about supporting it.  You have no idea how badly I want to come out and say "hey everyone, the LGBT community you're supporting, I'm one of them!".  I'm not ready to come out, don't know that I ever will be.  Don't think anyone really knows where their life will take them.

Secondly, I was at the goodwill today.  I'm going on a business trip and I wanted to get a few more casual shirts so it's usually my goto.  I was checking out, and the cashier next to the one I was at sounded clearly like a man (perhaps a slight twang, like might have been gay).  I look over, and it looked like a woman without makeup (hair tied back, femme face, plump lips, etc etc).  Now if I had to guess, it's either a gay man that happens to have those features (drag queens are often gay men that happen to fit the role), or it's someone that's secretly transitioning that hasn't crossed over.  All I could think about is how badly I wanted to see him in drag.  I know that sounds weird, but I was so curious what he looked like as a woman.

Thursday, January 19, 2017

another partial femme last night - nails (ratings?)

So the wig / shoes didn't last long last week.  Even my flats are killing my feet now for some reason?  Did my feet grow?  The wig felt silly with nothing else on...

So last night I was on my computer downstairs while my wife was in bed with a cold.  I had a baggie of semi-short french manicure nails sitting on my end table.  I do a lot of craft work, so it's not unusual for there to be various supplies like double sided tape.  I know I blogged about the really strong 3M stuff for applying nails, but I'm getting low so I grabbed a roll of some similar tape (no idea when or where I bought it).  Didn't work quite as well, but probably 90% as good adhesion (and much thinner).

I really missed this.  Looking back, I realized that every item you put on have their femme rating (at least in my eyes).  What I mean by that is how strong of a female pull does it have?  Could I imagine a guy wearing this?  Would he look silly, or could he pull it off?

* dress - Almost no men wear dresses.. If it has lace, or femme colors like pink or purple, this can have some serious pull.. probably an 8 or 9 out of 10.
* heels - I'd say these pull a good 8 or 9.  Yes, men wore heels and fancy shoes in the 1800's, but modern heels with shiny leather and the shape, they are fairly unmistakably femme
* hair - depends on the style.  I think long curls can really say "woman", but then rock stars often have that hair.  I'd say this rates maybe a 7 or 8
* hosiery - If they are very translucent, and perhaps you shaved before putting them on, these can have a pretty good pull (ESPECIALLY if they aren't plain and have a design in them).  I'd give them an 8 or 9 for the latter
* nails - easily a 9 or 10.  Men are pretty adamant about keeping nails short, and dull.  You have long nails, with polish (or french manicure) and they are shiny and smooth, it just screams woman.  If you shave the back of your hand, and just take a photo of the hand (so long as you don't have veins popping out), very hard to tell if it's a man's hand.